Half way there!

First I have to start with ... the results are negative! My Mom got her biopsy results yesterday and they are negative for cancer. They just want to do a follow up in 6 months since they weren't able to get the whole lump out. SUCH a relief to know for sure!

Yesterday was kind of a crazy day. I was pretty sore in the morning, but I did get myself up and did some yoga. It felt really good and I liked the DVD I did. It had someone doing modifications that I could follow. Some of those people are amazing. I can't even hold downward dog the whole time. About halfway through I noticed that my muscles felt kind of tingly and alive. Hard to explain, but it felt really good!

Only about an hour after school started, the office called saying that Aubrey was sick. Poor thing threw up in the hall on the way to the bathroom. She was very embarrassed. I'm glad she didn't do it in front of all the kids, because she would have been absolutely mortified. She didn't throw up again at home but fought vicious waves of nausea and had the runs all day. She must have caught some of the germs her brother had last week.

Didn't think she would make it to school today, so we slept in, but not much later than normal. There was NO part of me that wanted to work out. I was a little achy and had the beginnings of a headache. I just wanted to chill with Aubrey. I finally talked myself (I honestly don't know HOW!) into doing Firm Strength. I told myself to just do 10 minutes and then quite if I still didn't want to do it. By that point I was ready to finish the full workout. Aubrey was running around playing with Braden, so I figured if she could run around she should go to school. I sure hope she doesn't get sick there again ... I'd feel horrible!

I feel energized and am glad I worked out. I know I'd be feeling crappy and disappointed if I didn't workout.

No clever title for today

I had to DRAG myself out of bed at 6:30 am this morning. BUT, I DID it!!! I did Firm Cardio. I did notice I did not have the energy I normally have, so I just did what I could. I know my body just needs to get used to these early mornings. Right now I just want to crawl into bed and nap for four hours!!!

Last night I had kept having cravings for sweets. My subconscious kept popping these thoughts in my head and a few times I almost got up to get a snack without thinking. When I realized what I was about to do, I knew I wasn't hungry, in fact I was quite satisfied and snacking would only give me that overstuffed yucky feeling. I'd go through that process and not even a minute later it would pop back in. I was really able to notice how bizarre it was. I wasn't hungry. I didn't want to eat anything. I was sticking to my goals. Yet my mind tried its darnedest to sabotage things. I tried to think why I was having these thoughts and I think it is because I haven't been strict. We've had a few nights where we've eaten dinner late (like after 9pm) and a few nights where I did some light snacking. I will need to be more careful.

First Day of School!

So Aubrey had her first day of second grade today! We decided to walk to school, but I underestimated how much time we needed, so we really booked it. Right before we got to school she tripped a fell, poor thing. Got all scraped up but luckily no blood. She's at a new school, doesn't know anyone yet ... but she totally went inside without hesitation. I was prepared for her to be clingy and nervous. My girl is growing up!

I got up early and did MBS before we left for school. I am NOT a morning person, so I am quite proud! The walk to school wasn't too bad, but coming home was HARD (we live at the top of a BIGGGG hill.) It took me twice as long to get home.

My weight is only down .4 pounds this week, but I'm okay with that. Yesterday I went to my sister's for lunch after she blessed her baby and there were so many yummy foods. I didn't eat too much but definitely indulged in many foods I don't normally eat. So I am sure my weight will go back down over the next few days. And even if it doesn't I am NOT letting my weight determine my attitude. (If I keep saying it, maybe I'll eventually believe it!)

Week 8 stats

Week 8:
Weight - 215.0 (down .4 this past week, start weight 222)
Monday - MBS, 45 minutes, 35 minutes power walk
Tuesday - FC, 57 minutes
Wednesday - yoga, 45 minutes
Thursday - FS, 57 minutes
Friday -
Saturday -
Sunday -
Total minutes for week: 239 minutes

TGIF!

I didn't make it here yesterday, but I did have a good day. Did Firm Strength from start to finish. Felt great to get in a full workout. I was sweating buckets. I got in 40 minutes of Maximum Cardio today, but couldn't finish because Braden was too needy (he threw up again in the night and just isn't himself.) I felt very weak in the workout today and had to modify a lot, but I was proud of myself for doing it! The lead of this video is inspiring, because she seems like the body type I could aspire to.

Aubrey has been gone this week, and I have been really worried about how I can balance everything without her help (she is a BIG help with Braden) when she goes back to school. Now that I am working 30+ hours a week from home, trying to get in the exercise, plus being a Mom ... there aren't enough hours in the day. We got into such a nice rhythm this summer. I think I have been subconsciously concerned that my exercise would lack as a result. But I made it through this week (with Braden being sick) and know I will be able to do it. I'll definitely want to pull my hair out at times, I am sure. I just finished reading a book about a vampire (a good one) and he didn't have to sleep anymore. I was SO envious. Just think of all I could do if I didn't have to sleep or get tired!!! Good thing I don't know any vampires!

Week 7 measurements

So I finally got around to doing my measurements:

Week 7
weight - -6.6 lbs
chest - -.5"
R arm - -1.25"
L arm - -.75"
waist - -2"
hips - -1"
butt - -1"
R thigh - -.5"
L thigh - -.75"
R calf - -1.25"
L calf - -1.25"

If you remember, at my last measurement, I was so discouraged because my weight AND measurements went up ... some higher than when I started.

I am so glad I stuck to it, because now all of the numbers are going in the right direction. My body is definitely changing. Just a moment ago I scratched my shoulder and I felt a buldge (and not the bad kind!) ... I felt the slight rounded muscle at the top of my shoulder and thought ... "Where'd that come from?" My arms and legs are no longer just mush. They're mush with very distinct muscles beginning to pop through!!!

There's still that part of my that in impatient with the results and wants to be skinny NOW. But this is me not listening!

Week 7 stats

Week 7:
Weight - down .6 this past week, 6.6 total
Monday - REST
Tuesday - REST
Wednesday - 1/2 Vol. 3, 30 minutes
Thursday - FS, 57 minutes
Friday - MC, 40 minutes
Saturday -
Sunday -
Total minutes for week: 127 minutes

I'm here still ...

So I've been fighting the anti-exercise demons the last two days and he won two days in a row (after my two scheduled rest days). I finally put my foot down today and decided to try Vol. 3 (just bought it from swap). So about half way through (end of the last aerobic phase) I get a call from my Mom who is feeling anxious about the needle biopsy she is having next week (she had an abnormal mammogram a month ago, and the ultrasound yesterday). She's going through all of the emotions and what ifs and feeling alone when DS climbs up on my lap and proceeds to throw up all over both of us. I had to quickly hang up (just as she is expressing how ALONE she feels). As I stripped us down and we jumped in the shower, I could absolutely feel the adversary working against us (not just me from doing the workout, but in my being there for my Mom.) So, I got us cleaned up, got a throw up bowl and snuggled on the bed with DS while calling my Mom back. I was able to be there for her, we prayed together and worked through some of the feelings.

DS is now watching his favorite DVD and I needed to come here for some comic relief. I actually am feeling much better. I really feel that my Mom is going to be okay. The abnormality is very small; they almost just had her come back in 6 months to check. I feel that they are being very thorough, which is what I want. However the process could definitely been a challenge. My Mom has always been healthy (besides the car accident) and so this is such unexplored territory.

I've really been fighting the negativity and not being discouraged that I am not losing weight faster than I have been. When something like this happens, it really puts things in perspective. I know I will feel discouraged again and again, but the important thing is to work through it and then pick myself back up and keep moving forward. I know that depending on how next week goes, I may not be able to devote as much time and energy to my journey, but I am awake now and will not longer sleep in denial about what is best for my health.

TGIF!

I had a CRAPPY last night ... overindulged on pizza (thought I learned my lesson) and it spiraled into me into lots of negative thinking (not losing weight fast enough, not enough money, not enough time ... and on and on). After I got through the whole pity party thing, I realized how much overeating really affects my mood and confidence. I think it was something I haven't felt for a while, so it was such a shock on my system. Still recovering from it today, but feeling much more positive and more myself. Was feeling sore and SO not like working out this morning, but I was able to talk myself into doing SBHT. Felt SO much better when I completed it!

Aubrey and I might do a 5K walk/run tomorrow! My friend called and told me about it and we just might do it. Have to figure out the logistics, but wouldn't that be cool? I WILL overcome the negative thoughts, I WILL prevail.

It's

Feeling much better today (as far as soreness) so I decided to try a new workout I recently got, Aerobic Body Shaping. I don't know how people do this without pausing, because I had to pause between almost every equipment change. It was a pretty good workout, though!

I was looking at a calendar of my workout since June. I am SO impressed with myself. It was solid, all but the first week has at least 5 workouts (not counting the two vacation weeks.) This is big for me. Sometimes I still hear that doubting voice in my head saying, "You can't really do it" but most of the time I am seeing success. Why CAN'T I do it? Can't think of one reason!!!

Halfway through the week!

My body was really sore last night and this morning so I decided to take it easy. I've really been wanting to learn yoga and actually bought a mat a few weeks ago. So I pulled out one of my beginner routines, it's a cool DVD that has 4 25 minute sessions that teach the basic moves, breathing, etc. I can definitely see yoga as challenging my body in a different way. I only went through a few poses, but some of them were HARD to hold. And I am definitely no where near as flexible as I'd like to be. I just bought 9 new yogas DVDs for $20 (http://www.gaiam.com/retail/product/90-9053) and already have American Power Yoga and a Brian Kest yoga DVD.

If I am not too sore tonight, I might go run/walking with Aubrey. But I don't want to push it either!

We went and got a backpack last night for Aubrey. She was feeling very mature (she IS going into 2nd grade after all) and thought the character (hello kitty, princess, etc.) backpacks were much too juvenile for her! She picked out a very cute (and mature!) brown and pink with cheetah print bag. She told me that she really feels older than 7 ... kids are precious!

Transcendent Tuesday!

Well, maybe not SO transcendent, but pretty close!!!

Last night Aubrey and I went for a run/walk. It had been a while since we've done between vacations and the heat, so we decided to follow week one of C25K. I felt great but Aubrey had a harder time, I think she had to much in her belly from dinner. Normally I am trying to keep up with her!!!

Pulled out Cardio Burn today. It's got some pretty high impact stuff in it and I was able to keep up with some, but definitely had to modify some some my heart didn't pop out of my chest!

I really need to start going to bed earlier. It's not too long before Aubrey starts school and I'll have to get up earlier to get in a workout before she heads out.

Can't believe it's already the 13th!

I am not counting last week on this journey because between being out of town and then getting a yucky head cold (still clogged up today but manageable!) Did have a great time at the Lake. It was perfect weather. We did an awesome hike through some caves. There were man made steps carved out of the stone totally 440 steps one way. Braden didn't feel like doing most of it so I ended up with him on my back (all 32 lbs.), so it really was quite a workout!

I was very relieved that I did not gain. We only ate one meal out last week and cooked the rest, so I didn't eat too horribly, but definitely not as clean as when I am keeping track. I am going to start keeping track of my eating again today. Pulled out MBS and after a long discussion in my head I prevailed and got this body moving! MBS is definitely my go to video. It's got the weights with a bit of cardio to get my heart pumping.

Week 6 stats

Week 6:
Weight - -6
Monday - MBS, 45 minutes; Run/walk 30 minutes
Tuesday - CB, 48 minutes
Wednesday - Yoga, 25 minutes
Thursday - Aerobic Body Shaping, 54 minutes
Friday - SBHT, 30 minutes
Saturday -
Sunday -
Total minutes for week: 232 minutes

It's Thursday

Man, it's hot outside! Just got back from the store, and the heat just makes it so exhausting!

Got up and did FC this morning. There was no way I could do FS and FC back to back last week, but I thought I'd see if I could do it and I did! I've been reading a lot about should you do weight work back to back or not. (After all that is what FS and FC were originally designed for.) I think since my highest weight I'm using right now are 10 lb. dumbbells, I should be fine. I don't know why, but for me table work is SOOOO tough! I can do the squats, lunges, dips keeping up with the beat. When it comes to the table work, I can never quite crank out the reps! And that's without ankle weights. Oh well, it will come too!

Was supposed to go out to dinner last night with a friend but we ended up at my house ordering pizza so the kids could play. I knew last night would be a splurge night, so I ordered from my favorite place (they have sourdough crust ... yummy!) I put out fresh fruit and only ate 2 slices. Normally when we get this pizza, I eat 4-5 pieces and then am so uncomfortably full the rest of the night. I remember many times vowing I would never do it again yet next time it was same story. With the fruit being out I munched on that while we talked. It felt so good to enjoy the splurge without feeling horrible (physically and mentally) afterwards!

My sisters and I are planning to go rent a condo by a lake up north next week. I am really excited! I would like to continue with workouts while up there but not sure if I should lug weights up or what. I'll get in a workout at home Tuesday before heading up and will come home Friday, so I could squeeze one in that afternoon. That leaves Wednesday and Thursday. I'll have to think about what to bring. Maybe I could do some run/walk intervals and bring some pilates or SBHT.

Half way through the week

Taylor went to Las Vegas yesterday for a work trip so I am a single mother until Sunday night. It's weird because this is only the 2nd time in our 9 years of marriage that I'm home alone! (I'm normally the one taking off on him!!!) Aubrey slept with me last night, but man is she a loud sleeper, we are going to have to reconsider that tonight!

Just got done with FS. It feels awesome to really do a one hour workout 100%, no cheats. Of course Braden was up early this morning and was his usual helpful self (trying to ride his bike under me while I attempted plie squats.)

Been doing good keeping track of my eating. I realized I wasn't getting enough fiber, so I have been working on that. The rest of the numbers have been pretty good. The scale finally budged downward this morning, but I won't post officially on that until Monday.

Overall I am feeling very positive today. Got a lot of work ahead with my job today and I am ready to go!